02-03-08 Grave Concerns Over Postal Delivery
[Mr Toad]You know things are building to a head when people start sending coffins to other people...

Yes, that is, apparently, what one local resident received through the post last week: a coffin, albeit on a scale unlikely to accomodate him in any comfort.

OK so, from what I'm told, it wasn't this rather nice example of an Egyptian sarcophagus, but you get the idea I'm sure.
[Strange Mail arrives at Carradale Quayside]
It's said that the Prime Suspects have already been put to the inquisition and that Constabulary Enquiries are now being directed at the Royal Mail.

As one person, who wished to remain nameless, said: "He's brought it upon himself."

No doubt it'll be standing-room-only at Thursday's meeting of the East Kintyre Community Council.

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